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Wednesday, November 18, 2009

More Revelation...The Hard Way

On 9/7/09 I wrote the post, A Personal Revelation. Finally having a name...clairsentience... for what I've been experiencing during my lifetime is amazing, generally comforting (at least there's a reason for what's going on), and occasionally somewhat scary/exhilarating in a "what's next?" kind of way. This past weekend has opened my eyes (and Chris' eyes) even further along the psychic line. For one thing, it's clear that I'm going to need MUCH further help in creating protection, health and balance when I'm in situations where emotions are running high...like at funerals.

Having just come back from Minnesota, spent in celebration of my beloved Aunt Loraine's life, I can say the experience was one I shall never forget. It was incredible meeting again and spending time with our large extended family, mostly in this case folks from my Ma's side. Thankfully, what the family didn't know at the time was that as the hours went by in their presence, I was absorbing MORE and MORE of their emotions, some of which included intense grief, sadness, regret...or the beautiful flip-side including joy, happiness, love, you-name-it. That's what this clairsentient does really well ~ absorb. Not on purpose, mind you. Not because I want or need to. It's simply (or complexly?) something that I've always done (and always happens) in varying degrees, especially when I'm surrounded by concentrated emotions, AND MOST ESPECIALLY WHEN THOSE EMOTIONS ARE COMING FROM FOLKS I CARE ABOUT (be they family, friends, students, co-workers, etc.). But it's important to note again that until recently, I didn't know that what I am...what I did...what I have...had a name. I'm clairsentient. If I had written down all the examples of how this "trait" manifested itself over the years, I'd have a book full of true stories. Maybe someday I will fill such a book, hopefully along with truly useful tips to cope with the oft-misunderstood psychic gift of clairsentience. It's my goal to celebrate my psychic gifts positively, not find myself in the hospital with symptoms of absorption-overload! Us clairsentients need all the help we can get!

Believe me, I tried to protect myself this past weekend, using many of the tools of protection I've learned from the writings of various favorite authors, and then some (See Protection). Each day I grounded and centered. I meditated, albeit briefly. Each day I prayed for help. But the emotions I was surrounded by were too strong and fever-pitched for me to ward off. I became more off-balanced by the minute. Chris removed me from the situations each evening when he saw the color drained from my face and looking as though I was ready to drop. New to the scenario was that I even developed hives on my back (how attractive...not) that gratefully disappeared by morning. Thankfully, I don't believe any relatives were the wiser about what was happening to me. But as per usual, my joy at being with my family and/or friends was cut short because I had nothing left. All personal energy reserves were gone. I had sucked up some of my family's hard-core emotions without being asked to do so. Chris said he thought that I even "produced" emotions for those I was around if somewhere down deep I felt a need to do so...geez, how weird is that?!!! I looked like I was ready for my own death-bed by the time we got back to the hotel each evening. The next day, after a morning shower and a bit of make-up, no one guessed what had happened. But Chris and I knew.

On the flight back from MN, Chris suggested I look further on the internet for groups or organizations dealing with clairsentience. Yesterday, I found this: The Clairsentient Body. Chris and I were flabbergasted when we read the "symptoms" on this site and noted that most, if not all, applied to me. Today, Chris suggested I write the author of the site, which I will do soon.

I also found a few other blogs and sites dealing, sometimes briefly, with clairsentience. Some of these sites didn't appear to be as well-defined nor accurate as one would hope. It's clear that research and deep delving are going to be necessary to get the full picture of this psychic gift. It's clear that Chris and I have a journey ahead to understand clairsentience.

The author of The Clairsentient Body writes, "However, to feel, as in clairsentience, requires recognition, acceptance, and it takes commitment to learn the skills to manage the energy.

But wait, there's more to relate. When I was sick in bed each evening in MN, clairvoyant "movies" played out, showing people I had never seen before. I wondered if these people were from the past or for the future? What made me over-the-top nauseous was when the movies started to go faster. I said telepathically, "Stop," and they did. The movies made me think about how I was beginning to see all sorts of singular portraits of folks I didn't know at various times of the day over the previous weeks. It's as if I'm trying to be reached by crossed over people, but there doesn't seem to be rhyme nor reason to it all yet. Friend, Jenna, has suggested I keep a notebook with me at all times to record what these people look like. I can then refer to them if need be or at the very least, get them out of my head and onto paper!

Yesterday, I was alone in our foyer about to take a book out of a tote bag. Instead, as I grabbed for the book, a remembrance leaflet about Aunt Loraine popped out higher than the book I wanted. I picked the leaflet up and began reading. As I did so, a physical loving touch on my back caused me to swing around, because I thought Chris had teasingly crept up behind me. Chris was not there. I didn't see any form but I KNEW it was Aunt Loraine and burst out crying from the emotion of it. I thanked her for continuing to honor our "pact" of sending me clear signs once she crossed over.

Today, I was resting on our futon couch while Chris was in his music studio, practicing for this evening's gig. I heard LOUDLY, "Jeannine!". Clairaudience, loud and clear. It could have been either my Ma or Aunt Loraine, given the cadence in the voice. I called out to Chris, "Did you hear that?" He said, "What? No." I told him that the psychic door was swinging open wider...here we go...

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