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Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Dreams, Dreams, Dreams

Dreams from the end of '09 to the beginning of '10:

Very vivid, in-the-now, dream that seemed prophetic. Our David was telling me he must work. I told him, panicked, that he would never be able to pay for the apartment he has now and would end up, at best, in one room. He didn't care. He said he had to do this. I said he was ill and it wasn't necessary. In the dream I felt helpless but knew he had to make decisions for himself.

Same day... Literally fell asleep sitting up whilst knitting. I dreamed a woman brought me to her van and put a little Chihuahua pup in my arms. She said she had two pups and asked if I would like one. I said I'd need to ask my husband, Chris. Chris asked, "How big does this dog get?" I answered, "Not very." He said the dog would be the same size as Chloe, our cat, and that Chloe wouldn't like that at all. (note: What was weird was that Chris didn't seem opposed to a dog at all...just a small dog.) I sadly told the lady I couldn't take the puppy.

My brother, Bob, lived in a big, Brit-style, manor house. I went out from his house one morning and he locked me out. I had to eat black walnuts from the ground and scrounge for berries. He never let me back in.

I dreamed I was employed by a baker, like when I worked at Josef's (in Grosse Pointe, MI), but a bigger establishment than Josef's. On the day I was to begin work I couldn't find a white uniform that would fit me, now being a 52 year old. I saw a mini-skirt dress, like the kind I wore as a teen, in my closet. And there were other tops and pants in the same closet that would not fit right nor be appropriate for a 52 year old. I told my Ma to go into work for me so the job would not be lost.

The first dream segued into a dream featuring a different job that was on a pier, with boats tied up. In this second dream, I had NO clothes on; completely exposed. My boss took a bathrobe off a peg and gave it to me to cover up.

This second dream segued into a third dream featuring yet another job...this time at a university. I felt very comfortable at the school, whatever I was doing. I looked down and saw a winding staircase and said that I was content in such a setting.

Another "job" dream! I was working at a library, after having not been at the job long. Friend, Sadelle, came to visit the morning of work and I found myself 15 minutes late for work because of this. I walked to my register that was on an "island-style" desk inside the main room of the library. Other workers, including my boss, looked disgusted at me. I turned on the register with a key and worried that I didn't know what to do next. End of dream.

I was talking to an astrologer who told me about a new "service" the Catholic church offered called "Popetacks" (pronounced Pope-eh-tacks). This service had them (priests?) look at one's astrological chart, emphasizing four "themes" at a time. You had to pay extra for more "themes." I said, "Bloody Catholic church! They think they can control time, too."

A big red blanket covered Chris.

I was outside looking at myself in a mirror. The time period felt like the Wild West. I couldn't see my reflection because I was surrounded by bright light. I kept trying to fix my hair, etc., but the light was so bright I couldn't see to do so.

Terrible dream...I was raped by my brother, Bob, and my Dad. A dream of survival and a fight against homelessness.

I lived with Chris in a big, co-op style house with my brother, Bob, and my Ma. One morning...a beautiful one...I was in the large backyard when a hummingbird flew very close to me. I put my finger out, like a perch, and the bird landed on it. I talked to the hummingbird and admired its beauty. In a little while, it flew away. I came in the house and my Ma was coming out of her bedroom, adjusting her skirt and boasting how her figure was so great and how wonderful she looked in the skirt. She cared less what I had to say about the bird experience. I mumbled something not so nice under my breath, as my brother, Bob, walked past.

I literally took a nap sitting up on my futon in my spinning room in the afternoon. Felt myself going into a deep sleep. Chris was working at the computer in the same room as I slept. I remember thinking as I dreamed that I must get up. As I did, a man with a beautiful voice started singing. I physically opened my mouth and as I did, I realized it was I who had the beautiful male voice. I experimented by opening and shutting my mouth, but the singing continued. I woke up soon after.

In the dream I was in a large, old house that I lived in. Candy (childhood friend from Detroit), came to visit me and presented me with a beautiful red lacquered box as a gift. Inside the box was a brooch that looked like ivory, with a relief of horses on the front of the brooch. Attached to the brooch was a bottle (seemingly too big for the pin) that I realized was a scent diffuser. I profoundly thanked Candy for the gift. Also in the box was another talisman of ivory, but this time of a rhinoceros. Candy said she gave me the gift in commemoration of us getting back in touch and being friends again.

Another job dream! I was scheduled to teach a short, 3-hour spinning workshop at Harrisville Designs. A women with blond hair was to drive me to the gig because Chris couldn't. About the time we were to leave, I realized I did not pack enough supplies to work with. I began pulling out pillow cases full of fibers, looking desperately for what I needed. I decided to get some synthetic fibers to go with the wool I had already packed. Stuff was strewn everywhere and the clock ticked closer to the time that the class was scheduled to begin. I started looking for swatches of the synthetic fibers when I realized that the class was about to begin but we hadn't even left the house yet. Panic engulfed me. I worried whether I should call Harrisville or not, telling them I was sorry I couldn't make the class. I grappled with this and never called. Later, when Chris arrived home I said,"I told you I didn't want to teach anymore! Now look what has happened!!"
(Later, when I told Chris he said it was "classic." He said it was a better dream than trying to weigh a dead deer, blood all over me, with the scale not working." Chris continued, "It's only about fiber. No one has died.")

Two nightmares! One dream was that I was stalked by a creepy guy who frequents the library in Brattleboro. The other dream was that I found Chris and Alexander dead on the floor of a HUGE aquarium tank, with HUGE black, orange, and blue goldfish swimming and poking about them. Next thing I knew, after I was ready to jump into the tank to get them...Chris was very much alive and reading under the tank. The tank was on a stand with legs, so Chris could easily fit underneath it. Alexander was very much alive and behind the tank, playing a tune on South American panpipes. He played along with some sort of recording on a tape player. End of dreams.

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